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Your word is a lamp to guide my feet and a light for my path.
I’ve promised it once, and I’ll promise it again: I will obey your righteous regulations.
I have suffered much, O Lord; restore my life again as you promised.
Lord, accept my offering of praise, and teach me your regulations.
My life constantly hangs in the balance, but I will not stop obeying your instructions.
The wicked have set their traps for me, but I will not turn from your commandments.
Your laws are my treasure; they are my heart’s delight.
I am determined to keep your decrees to the very end.       Psalm 105-112 (NLT)
All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work.        2 Timothy 3:16-17 (NLT)
It’s the time of the year that gift-giving has become the media headline and an obsession of most breathing persons. We have taken over the job of Santa Claus and have made lists that we are checking twice, three times… oh, admit it! We have lost count as to how much we check our lists and try to figure a way for our limited funds to cover the wishes of the recipients. Many of us struggle to learn, and in turn teach our children, the true meaning of Christmas. We desire to focus on the Gift of Jesus the Messiah and be the givers that Jesus taught us to be. How do we change? How do we truthfully teach our children? Here is a truth: Nothing of good and lasting change will come without a price. So what am I willing to spend to make a change? I believe there are Three Steps. Simple but not necessarily easy.
Step One: Bible Study. Simple. Too simple, you say? If you are not giving at least 30 minutes to Bible study every day, then do not knock what you haven’t tried!
Think about how many people are “members” of your church. How many attend 3 out of 4 Sabbaths/month? How many also attend Sunday School or a weekly small group? If attending a class, does the class require some reading/study outside the 30 minute class or is the teacher spoon-feeding the members what he/she believes?
There are no shortcuts to Bible study. That is why “they” call it study. Unlike some of the subjects I had to devote my time in school, the time I spend reading the words that God gave are relevant to my life and I do use them every day. Every time I read passages in my study time, I come away with some “nugget” that teaches me, encourages me, or just makes me think about what I believe. This simple first step has had a profound effect on my life. God has used it to speak to me. 1 Peter was the anchor that I held during a divorce. Luke 22 and John 14-16 began my healing after my son died. 1 Corinthians 13 is among several passages that speak into my marriage today.
Step Two: Words to Action. If I had a manual to teach me how to paint my house but never did what the manual told me, my house would still be the same brown color it is now. Studying the Bible is the first step; putting God’s words into action is the second step.
It takes God’s Word and His Spirit to direct me in the path that He has for me. God has a purpose and a plan for me to fulfill that purpose. He has and will continue to gift me for that purpose. I remember when God opened the door for me to be a part of His mission to Hungary. Yes, the country in Eastern Europe. That country had never come into my plan for my life! And the opening was about doing a children’s camp, much like a Vacation Bible School that are a common occurrence in the summer here in the States. I was flabbergasted! I have never done a children’s Sunday School class. I have done children’s musicals but I was always very clear – I teach the music, someone else organizes and keeps control of all the little ones! I was panicked at the idea of leading a team to a foreign country I knew little about and do two two-week camps! Finally, in my prayers that quiet voice of the Holy Spirit got through to me and said, “I did not ask you to do it all, Jody! I just asked you to organize the team and make it happen.” Sure enough, God already had a woman picked out with teaching giftings to work with children. And she knew others and we knew some more and before you know it we had about 15 people to come in two waves to do the camps. We were just God’s instruments to empower the others. God just needs willing, obedient hearts.
Step Three: Fellowship. We are not islands. God tells us we are His Body, each a part with a function and made to work together. He teaches us that as we grow in Him we produce fruit like love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control. We need the fruit in order to work together as He wants us to do – in unity.
I am not going to lie or sugar-coat this step. I have found it difficult to connect with a fellowship. I am not looking for a “perfect” fellowship because then I could not be a part of it! I am looking for a group of people who want to reach out and welcome those who do not know Jesus. A fellowship that will then nurture (disciple) those new to faith in Jesus no matter their “station” in the world and challenge me to grow in my faith in Jesus. I look for worship that isn’t started with an “order” that cannot be flexible or stopped by a clock. I haven’t found that fellowship. Today, at this moment, I am wondering if God isn’t asking me to “infect” the fellowship of which I am a part. It seems I have been a part of that struggle for a very long time. But not as long as Jesus has! If I am His disciple, His ambassador in this world, can I do no less?
And so I come back to giving. Jesus is showing me how to give in ways that do not cost money. I may not see this side of heaven what my giving may mean in the Kingdom. God is asking for willing and obedient hearts. The rest is His to direct and complete.
As we go to church on Christmas Eve and sing Silent Night let us take a moment and bow our heads and ask God, “What would you like me to give You, my King?” If my ears are truly open, I have a feeling that the answer will be quick. Listen.
This song by Chris Eaton and Amy Grant is worth a listen. Sung by Amy Grant, I Need a Silent Night

I’ve told you these things for a purpose: that my joy might be your joy, and your joy wholly mature. This is my command: Love one another the way I loved you. This is the very best way to love. Put your life on the line for your friends. You are my friends when you do the things I command you. I’m no longer calling you servants because servants don’t understand what their master is thinking and planning. No, I’ve named you friends because I’ve let you in on everything I’ve heard from the Father. John 15: 11-15 (The Message)
The above scripture carries one phrase that jumps out where friends are concerned: Put your life on the line for your friends. What a blessing it is to have real friends who actually put actions to those words. I pray that I can be that kind of friend as well.
Several years ago, through a series of miraculous circumstances, I became involved with an incredible group of people in Atlanta. We had just lost my husband of 18 years and were far from home, unable to receive comfort from family and friends of old. God used this new group, and especially its leader, to change my life in ways that I know will be impacting me until I reach my real home in Heaven.

The first time that I ever spoke to Drew Sewell was on the telephone. My husband, Victor, had mistakenly ended up at his plastics company, looking for another company where he had an interview. When Victor left in order to be on time for his appointment, Drew called our home phone number immediately to see if he was coming back because he wanted to offer him a better job. He said, “I don’t know where you are in your faith, ma’am, but I don’t think he was here by accident.” We both know now that it was no accident. Drew held up his end and had the Maintenance Supervisor interview Victor. He was hired that week. Victor worked there for 2 days, became ill, and died 3 months later. We were all in shock, and at that time, could not understand why our meeting had taken place at all. Through Victor’s illness, there were phone calls and hospitals visits, and one time even a check, from this man whom we had only known a few weeks. He attended the funeral and brought with him another person who became very important to me as well. She even drove to Florida for Victor’s second memorial service. The stories of God’s love through them are countless during this time. That was the first embodiment of John 15:12.
Over the next year, Drew and several people from his company, continued to stay in contact with me as they had done during his illness. The care, concern, emails, calls, and actions that he and others shared during Victor’s illness and afterwards shone like a bright light, one that I knew was coming from the heart of God. It drew me like a magnet to them and to something called Impact that they began talking about almost a year later.

Impact is an all-day event that happens in one of the darkest places in Atlanta, GA. People are offered a meal, music, prayer, and all kinds of resources that they may need while they are living in less than desirable conditions. Through one person’s obedience to a God-given call, the love of God for a hurting people draws together businesses, churches, government agencies, and countless individuals to bring about change wherever these events are set up. The main offerings at these events are just the love of God and a hand-up in a time of need. They come at first for the “stuff” that we give away, but they end up staying with us all day because we want them to stay. We show them that desire by loving on them, accepting them just as they are, and offering them the Hope that is inside of us. It’s a Light that they are drawn to and are letting get brighter in their own lives as they see more of Jesus in those around them.

Working at these events since 2007, we have seen so many miracles. There is no other word, truly. But the thing that has changed me the most is watching Drew. It is hard to think of a person who serves so many so selflessly. He gives of his time by going out to the streets and talking with and loving on the most unlovable people. They actually stink, and yet there he is, hugging them and hanging out with them–a big business man who could easily just take another route home. Seeing his actions, feeling compassion for them in my own heart but not knowing what to do, I just began to follow his lead. After awhile, the stink didn’t bother me either! It became clear that the act of loving them was changing them, from the inside out, and I was hooked, too. Driving out there on that street, we wave at people and stop and talk to them by name–they are a part of our lives now. There is no separation between us because it is love that is there now and love that has leveled the playing field.
He selflessly gives of his money in the most creative ways. Before they closed down the two most popular restaurants, I used to watch him drive up and buy “feasts” as I called them–enough food for 5-10 people. He would just hand them over to one of the leaders on the street and a small group would come running up. They were respectful, appreciative, and generous with what they had been given. They, too, were following Drew’s example in the way that they could, even if it was only in passing out a meal that they had been given. Again, following his lead, even though I don’t have his money, I began sharing a meal at Wendy’s or buying someone a soda or even toilet paper. Doing so has created a new heart within me. Honestly, I can’t even go into the store anymore without thinking “Do I really need this? What if I were on the street, would this even really matter?”
Seeing a person like Drew with so much money but who lives like a regular person and gives away what I know he gives away–well, let’s just say that that’s where my prayer to be blessed with money came from. It won’t be for me, Lord, because giving it away is so much fun!! This past May, the Lord gifted me with a rather large windfall that I was able to use in this way. I say this, not to say anything about me, but to pass on what a blessing it was to just give away what He gave me. All my needs had been met, and seriously, what “stuff” did I really need? It was the best “spending spree” I ever went on, the most fun I had ever had paying my tithe because I actually saw where it went and results, with a lesson that I will never forget, thanks to Drew’s selfless example. That windfall hasn’t repeated itself, but there have been other times when a lesser windfall found its way onto the streets or into the home of a resident or two. See, it’s not the amount that matters—it’s the heart and the desire to give what you may not want to give for fear you won’t have what you “need.” Whether it’s $70 or your last 53 cents—God watches the heart of the giver. That’s what watching Drew serve others has taught me.

Many times, I hear Drew say “there but for the grace of God, go I” and know in my own heart that without God’s grace and mercy, I, too, would be on that street–that’s a fact for another story. People all around us are walking the streets—even in their own hearts, if not in the natural. Watching Drew love and serve every person the same has changed my life forever. I see the difference that he makes in people’s lives, whether they walk the streets, the halls of his company, or meet him the way that I did. His example has influenced me in ways that I am still only learning–ministry, business, and life–God has used this man in a mighty way, and I am privileged to call him friend and brother.

Last year, when I moved back to Atlanta, a door opened for me to become more involved with Impact on a full-time basis. One of the most important tasks that I believe God has given me through this opportunity to work with Drew is to help share the message of John 15:12, which is Drew’s vision for Impact. Drew’s example might be what we share, but he is only following the example of Jesus–and that is the real message. We may not be preachers, but we are called to deliver a message that we pray is now, and will forever, change the hearts of the Body of Christ. As we talk to others in all walks of life about assisting us with Impact, it is within us to move them to do only what Jesus asks us to do every day of our lives—put your life on the line for your friends. Whether it’s at an event or just driving down the street today, hurting people need to see Him in their lives through His example in our lives. And after all, isn’t that where the rubber meets the road?

To ‘honor’ is to give respect, even more, to give reverence and homage. It is those words that I would use only to refer to my Creator, my Savior, and the One who has my heart first and foremost.
During this time of year, we live in a world that has a different focus on who should receive honor. First we had Halloween that slides seamlessly into Thanksgiving and Christmas decorations and shopping comes out simultaneously with the costumes. What are we to do to be the ‘salt and light’ in these holidays?
Three pastors gave their thoughts about Halloween in response to our inquiry about the focus of popular Fall Festivals:
I once delivered a sermon entitled “Don’t Fear The Dark.”  The point of the sermon was just that.  As followers of Jesus Christ, we have been infused with the light of truth.  Why recoil from such things as Halloween?  I appreciate people’s concerns with seemingly embracing a dark holiday.  However, is Halloween really a dark holiday?  I would contend that it is, or at least have become for the vast majority of those who celebrate it, a distinctly American tradition for dressing up, having costume parties with friends and family, and for children to find and eat as much candy as possible.  Perhaps it is indicative of a culture of excess, with children and adults alike indulging in sweets and frolicking, but not any more so than on any other day of excess in American life.  My aim is to redeem the holiday, as with any other day, for the glory of God and the exaltation of Jesus Christ.
I am fully supportive of fall festivals and similar activities.  At the church I currently serve, we ask church members to decorate the trunk of their car with lights, fun Halloween decorations (we stay away from the gory and overtly scary), pumpkins or gourds, and pass out candy during the same time that the downtown businesses do in our area.  Our church is located just a few feet out of the downtown district.  We take advantage of this time to pass out information about the church and small Gospel tracts which are specifically geared toward the Halloween time.  We do our best to make Halloween a time for soul-winning and outreach.  Just as we do for every other time of the year.  We serve a God of redemption.  Our goal is to redeem the day, as with all days! – Rev. Chris Surber, Pastor First Congregational Church, Peru, IL , author of The Sacred Journey and Sweet Potatoes in my Coffee
I have struggled with this same question for years, and I have come down on the fact that Halloween is the second most popular “holiday” in America, next to Christmas.  People are out and about, and will come to events that churches put on simply because of the day.  Therefore, I cannot see Jesus not taking advantage of a time when people will come to you to hear the gospel.  While churches don’t promote gore, death and darkness, we do encourage dressing up, playing games, giving out candy, and focusing on Jesus as the One who gives us life and makes us new people.  While many people will still come only for the fun, games and candy, it is a great time to plant seeds, make friendships and just love on people where they are.  – Rev. Ted Wood, Pastor Rockledge United Methodist Church, Rockledge, FL
We don’t have what is called a “Fall Festival”.  We do have a fall Bazaar and fish fry.  The purpose of the Fall Bazaar is to raise funds to support our youth ministry.  The fish fry proceeds go to the men fellowship for different projects.  – Rev. Riley Richardson, Pastor, Myrtle Grove United Methodist Church, Pensacola, FL
It is wonderful to see God’s children obediently seeking to fulfill the Great Commission by following Jesus’ example…
“Now go out to the street corners and invite everyone you see.’ So the servants brought in everyone they could find, good and bad alike, and the banquet hall was filled with guests.” Matthew 22:9-10 (NLT)

Four couples with children were asked about Fall holidays and celebrations. What are you teaching your children?
Couple A
have 3 children ages 9, 7, and 5
We have no Fall celebration in our home other than Thanksgiving.  I am very honest with my kids about Halloween.  I have explained to them that I do not like it because it promotes fear, terror, horror, and is all around evil.  I then explain that all those things come from hell.  They get it.  On the other hand, I am not…afraid, or concerned about Halloween.  We have never taken the kids trick or treating other than at big church festivals (which, by the way, they always get way more candy there).  We have fun with the kids and let them dress up as something for school…a race care driver, Woody the cowboy, etc.  We avoid any type of “haunted house” experience, or scary movies.  Public school is always an issue with this type of holiday.  Not knowing what they will do to celebrated the day is the problem.  It hasn’t been a problem the last few years, mostly just dress up and candy.  We will see as they get older.  Halloween does provide a good opportunity to talk to our kids about “stuff.”
Couple B
have 2 children, ages 5 and 2
My kids are a little atypical in what you can explain to a two and four year old and expect them to grasp.  To them dress up is fun, candy is good, and hanging out with anyone is Good Times.  To them “God is bigger than the boogieman, bigger than Godzilla or the monsters on TV” to quote a Veggie Tale’s song.  However, they know what appears scary and even though they know it’s not real it opens their eyes to a thing we constantly are teaching them which is DO NOT LIVE IN FEAR!!! We celebrate life, fellowship, and playing dress up!! We rebuke and teach against fear and the motives behind it.  My children are taught daily to believe in and on the cross, and through His light there is no prevailing darkness!!!!!!!!!
Couple C
have 2 children, ages 8 and 5
We have a “October Jam” at our church which we usually attend. It’s fun for the kids to dress up and frankly we as parents also like candy! It provides a family friendly, safe environment for kids and our church does a community wide festival not on church property,  at a nearby park. We give away bags of “goodies” with lots of information in it inviting them to church for a “free gift”, which is a way to outreach. Also the Gospel is shared in open air with a drama.
As our children get older we do explain the meaning of Halloween and why we don’t necessarily celebrate it per say, and we don’t trick or treat because its just not safe anymore. You just don’t know people and what they put in those bags.
Couple D
have 1 child, 10 months old
We have always loved Halloween as a time to bring many friends, from our work, our church, and neighborhood together and try to outdo each other with great costumes! The history of All Hallow’s Eve began with the Celts as a celebration of the end of harvest. What we do now in America has more to do with the media and retail sales and did not begin here until the early 1900’s. During the Depression and into post World War II, ‘trick or treating’ was an opportunity for poor children to “appropriately beg” for goodies. They wore costumes so they weren’t recognized and to maybe receive more candy for their clever costumes.
We will be teaching our children history and to reach out to people.

Jody Neufeld is the editor of Bible Study Paths. She has been an RN for more than 30 years; the mother of three and grandmother of six. She and her husband are the owners of Energion Publications and Neufeld Computer Services.
How do I live in thanksgiving like Psalm 100 when I have lost my job and we hope we aren’t homeless by Christmas?
I want to begin by saying that I do not have all the answers. That is no surprise and neither is it a surprise that God is the only One who does!
Psalm 100 (New Living Translation)
Shout with joy to the Lord, all the earth!
2 Worship the Lord with gladness.
Come before him, singing with joy.
3 Acknowledge that the Lord is God!
He made us, and we are his.
We are his people, the sheep of his pasture.
4 Enter his gates with thanksgiving;
go into his courts with praise.
Give thanks to him and praise his name.
5 For the Lord is good.
His unfailing love continues forever,
and his faithfulness continues to each generation.
It’s interesting, and right on target, to me that you mentioned Psalm 100. Many worship services begin with all or part of this psalm as a call to worship. And I remember that the Thanksgiving after my son died that this was the call to worship and I surely did not feel like shouting with joy!
Which makes me think of the guy who might have wrote this song – David. We don’t know at what point in his life that David might have wrote this. Depending on when David wrote this song, he might have wrote it in victory or he might have been affirming that, even though he was being hunted down or his kingdom was crumbling, God was still on His throne and His love and faithfulness would continue.
Even in the middle of terrible times, God is faithful and His love is still there for us. And the wonderful thing is that God knows my life and knows the condition of my heart. He can handle my questions and my anger. He sees the big picture that gives me a look into the ‘why’ of it.
I pray you will make a choice, Dear Reader, to grab on to God like Jacob did and ‘wrestle’ out your questions with God (Genesis 32:22-32). Do not let Him go until He blesses you! I also hope you will have open eyes to see what could be next in your life. Do not limit God’s answer to what you might think should happen. He has been known to lead us out of our comfort zone so that we will rely even more on Him and the path turns out to lead us into His Promised Land. I also pray that your circle of Believers, family and friends, will hear God’s voice and help you. Remember that even the patriarch, Moses, needed friends to hold his arms up during a crucial battle (Exodus 17:8-13). Accept God’s messengers and the gifts that they bring from Him.
God bless you.

My desk for work is also geographically located in my home. I am a detail person and a multi-tasker. For all the wonderful plus’s to having your own business, holidays are days that I can count on the business being ‘closed’ but it also means – no business and no money coming in. So my husband and I are working long hours, as many others must do, to finish work before the other offices shut down for the holidays.
In the middle of all of this scurrying around, there is Thanksgiving. I am alternately sad and relieved that I have no children who live within driving distance so we will not have any guests for a ‘table-groaning’ meal. I won’t be cooking for 10 hours. Now I am sad that I won’t be cooking because if I was the table would be full – of people I love.
Thanksgiving. Giving thanks for the ALL. Looking at what is the ALL and choosing to look for the “Thanks” any way. If life seems to be moving at warp speed and money is available at a snail’s speed, let’s work together on our list.
THE LIST
Thank You, LORD:
For putting me here. For giving me opportunities to be Your hands, Your feet; a leaky container of Your Love.
For the many friends. Some of them are my family. Some of them have been in my life for years and are solid gold. Some are new friends and You are refining us together.
For allowing me to be born in a country with freedom. May I never take it for granted.
For my family. For the gifts You have placed in them and the Kingdom work they are doing.
For the millions of ‘details’ that You made: a baby’s giggle, leaves turning colors, beaches that roar, mountains that stand in silent tribute, a touch that is gentle and yet strong in its presence.
For Your grace (love), mercy (forgiveness), and wisdom that You have promised in unending amounts.

Our intrepid traveler, Iris Lloyd, has sent us some pictures from her Fall travels. I hope all of us take some time to look at the splendor of God in all the colors of His creation. – The Editor
[slideshow]

BSP: What is your educational background? How did that education equip you for ministry and how did it fall short?
CW: I experienced my call at age 15 at the Kansas West annual Conference ordination service. I was a member of the conference through the Conference Commission on Youth Ministries and one of our adult leaders was being ordained that night. The Reverend Paul Matthaei was preaching. I start with that bit of information because my undergraduate degree was specifically chosen with my ministry in mind. My local church was not very supportive (think early-mid 1970’s), but there were many on the district and conference level that felt differently.
After a year in Switzerland as an exchange student through the International Christian Youth Exchange, I began my freshman year at Friends University. I had every intention of doing a liberal arts degree with an emphasis in theater and music. It became apparent after my freshman that the theater and music departments were at odds. So my major became drama and I worked on a minor in music.
No one believed me when I said I planned on being a pastor. The school was relatively conservative and evangelical and there were not a lot of models for women in ministry. I choose theater, because I believed (and accurately as it turns out) that I would receive plenty of theology, Bible, church history and doctrine in seminary. What I wanted was to be able to be comfortable with readings, with preaching, and with interacting with groups of people.
Most of my ministry until recently have been in very rural areas and my music and drama has helped me immensely. Creating worship that flows well makes sense and has a common thread woven throughout the service. Even in small towns, that focus on worship has blessed the congregations, the people, and myself.
The area where my education at both the bachelors and master’s level fell short is in administration. Like most clergy, it is my least favorite task. And yet, being ordained to word, sacrament, and order has never been optional. We, as clergy, are not given choices as to which two our three we will do. Through diligence and perseverance I have learned to read in-depth financials and converse with financial officers and with executive type lay persons. As far as I am concerned, every clergy should be required to take a business class in order to do the administration necessary in the local church. I would have complained in seminary, but now I wish I would have had it.
BSP: What is the mission of the current fellowship you serve? How are they impacting the community they serve?
CW: The mission of West Heights United Methodist Church is “Changing Lives by Connecting Hearts to Jesus Christ.” All our ministries are beginning to be more focused on ministry and mission outside our walls. Each month we have a food challenge to support United Methodist Open Door’s food ministry. Our food total through the end of July has been 13,000 plus pounds as well as over 80 bags of hygiene products and diapers. We host the Red Cross blood drive in conjunction with other west side churches. We support, with other churches, the seasonal homeless shelter with meals and contributions as well as serving meals 6-8 times a year at the U.M. Open Door’s homeless drop-in center. Our children have handed out socks and mittens to the homeless with St. John’s Episcopal Church’s Sandwich Saturday, and created gifts and visited our home bound. Our youth participate in all kinds missions to individuals and organizations. We host the West Side Shepherd Center an ecumenical group that reaches out to senior adults. We have the West Heights preschool, which was one of the first preschools forty years ago. Of course this does not mention any of our ongoing programs within the church, but our commitment to connect lives and hearts means reaching out to those who are not connected.
BSP How could the UMC better support you in ministry?
CW: Tough question. This would be an invitation for me to complain, but I really hate doing that. Even though we are a connectional system, I have always had the sense it was sink or swim. I was not always sure I could depend on support. Having said that, if I have ever had an issue that I believe could be brought to the District Superintendent’s attention, or could cause problems, the D.S. was, and is, the first person I call. I don’t like surprises and I have assumed D.S.’s are the same.
I came into the system at 23 and was the second youngest in my seminary class with an average of 37. I was among the youngest 15 clergy in my annual conference for much longer than I should have been. At almost 52, I am grateful for the support and encouragement of young clergy. My slight frustration is that with an emphasis on “young” we devalue years of service and learning that comes with experience. I am sure there is some kind of balance that can find a way to incorporate the energy, new trends, and possibilities that young adults bring, with an appreciation for what can only be learned through experience and an understanding of history. I am getting a wee bit weary of the statements that I, at my age, cannot relate to anyone under 40 or over 65. As some one who has mastered Facebook and Twitter and have encouraged my church to find ways to use social media as a “connecting” tool, I believe that dichotomy of young/old may not be as helpful as it appears.
BSP: If you could change one thing in the ordination process, what would it be?
CW: I have just rotated off my second 8-year term on the Board of Ministry. My first term was from 1988-1996 and this one was 2002-2010. There have been many changes over the years. I believe in an educated clergy and clergy that can have appropriate boundaries. However, that means the process tends to be long and frustrating. Men and women want to “be” in ministry and often feel shackled and hindered from doing the work they have been called to do. The conference has an obligation to protect local churches and to properly “vet”, if you will, any person wanting to be ordained a deacon or an  elder. While the process may be cumbersome, it is one way to make sure, as much as humanly possible, to provide the best pastors one can. I think if I were to change it, it would have to do with supervision in order to shorten the process, not in integrity, but in time.
BSP: What congregational expectations of the pastor are unrealistic?
CW: Is this a trick question? What congregational expectations of the pastor are unrealistic? Like all of them? I jest. I have served churches in three-point charges where the smallest church averaged 8 on a good Sunday morning, a county seat church where we average around 175, and now a large suburban church where we average around 325. As a woman in ministry, it was occasionally difficult for those churches to balance the need for the traditional “clergy wife” with a clergywoman.
I have found that churches will take everything I have and then some. So it took my first few years, to establish boundaries about what I would do, and what I would not do. Even small churches can accept areas of expertise and areas where I was woefully inadequate.
I found that it was important for me to define those areas and priorities for ministry. This is not an easy task. It took a divorce in 10^th year of ministry for me to really focus on what was important.   I became clear about how I prioritized ministry: preaching and worship, my calling: hospital and emergency;  and then administration.
Above and beyond that, I was single mom for a while, so I stacked meetings in order to be home more and informed the church, that I would do school parties, go to ball games, and attend school activities for my children. In small towns, that was a bonus. I came to my current setting after my last child graduated from high school. Since I tend to work too much, I am grateful that this opportunity did not open before then. I would have been sorely tempted to work too many hours, which would have been a disservice to my son.
I try to balance it all, work, family, and self-care. Often, I do not do it well. I am driven to be a preacher. It is in my bones. The challenge for me is to balance all those parts of who I am, preacher, wife, mother, grandmother, amateur chef and potter in order to live the fullest of who I have been created to be by God.